Swansea City v Norwich City, U18 Premier League
Haverfordwest County v Goytre, Welsh Football League,
Milford United v Angle, Pembrokeshire League,
At my Swindon residence for the weekend, so the opportunity was taken for a day out to West Wales. So it was the 0840 Swansea service off Swindon, where module failure at Bourton meant an on arrival platform change and a mad scramble across the station..
Football grounds visible from the railway - the Millenium Stadium.
Football grounds visible from the railway - the Tanodome home of the Cardiff Red Sox.
Football grounds visible from the railway - Baglan.
Football grounds visible from the railway - The Liberty Stadium
Football grounds visible from the railway - my first destination, the Landore training ground of Swansea City.
Into Swansea (High Street).
I made my way out of the side entrance and straight onto a bus heading along the Neath Road…
…a closer view of the Liberty…
…before alighting in Brynhyfryd.
Taking a footbridge across the A4067, this gave me another elevated view of the training complex.
In front of it is this. One of the easiest ways to measure someone on a cuntometer, is whether or not they have ever used the world's dullest fact, i.e. What the Welsh for microwave oven is. Of a similar ilk, I now know that the Welsh for indoor bowling is the type of phrase that Paddy McGuiness might use. That's not Paddy McGuiness the terrorist, it's the professional vacant Lancastrian who hosts that fake tan version of Blind Date.
Behind it led Swanseas self-lauded new training and academy complex, which cost £6 million to build. It is good to know that the club are willing to invest as much as a third of what they spend in agents fees, on the future players of the club.
Swansea City 1 v Norwich City 1, U18s Premier League.
The U18s premier league is competed by clubs with category 1 status youth academies. Tellingly, of the 24 teams, only 9 are Premier League clubs. In the south competition, Swansea are bottom Norwich are seventh.
V
The complex comprises two adjacent pitches.
There main feature is a large amenities block.
On the far pitch, are a series of Atcost stands. This sends out a forceful message to the players "if you don't do well, you'll spend the rest of your career playing amongst pre-fab wank like this". Motivation indeed.
There was quite a significant problem in that the pitches are only a few feet apart.
On the adjacent pitch, the two clubs U16s side were playing, wearing identical kit to the U18s, causing a few Peterborough steward style passes.
I got the reverse picture from earlier, with an Arriva Pacer crossing Landore viaduct on an a shack attack to Cardiff. I think the silhouette makes it look like a 504? Normal people wouldn't understand that comment.
Swansea scored at the start of second half, Norwich equalising with the last kick of the game, it finishing 1-1.
As I was leaving, the first team players were arriving ahead of their game against Crystal Palace. Here Jack Frank Porteous Cork is commiserated by a fan about scraping the alloys on his Bentley. Cork is not only renown for being a poor judge of nearside kerbs, he also made over 200 professional appearances whilst he was at Chelsea, the only downside being that none of them were actually for them.
I jumped on a bus back into town.
This dropped me off right outside the station.
As any student of 1990s British cinema will know, the forecourt of Swansea station is the location of one of the greatest scenes.
Pretty. Shitty. City. Oh go on then, I'll help you. “Dylan Thomas didn't do as much fucking cocaine as you”
How I laughed at those people who had to endure a 142 on the hours journey to Cardiff. How I stopped laughing when I saw what was on my 2.5 hour journey to Pembroke Dock.
Leaving Swansea and passing the new electric train depot at Maliphant. Built in hope over expectation as it has yet to be confirmed that electrification will continue to Swansea and even if it does, the project is hideously delayed.
Football grounds visible from the railway – Waunarlwydd of the Swansea league.
Football grounds visible from the railway – the Elba home of Swansea ladies.
The railway along the sea wall at Dawlish gets all the plaudits, but I always think the railway beyond Gowerton could rival that view.
I say could, because at some point, someone has decided that there's only one thing that could potentially enhance an unobstructed view across Loughor estuary to the Gower, and that is a shoreline run of electricity pylons.
Past Llanelli, and onto 'let's fuck with the English by pronouncing the double L normally' marshes of Kidwelly.
Then the run down the amazing Towy estuary, from its mouth at Caerfyrddin bay...
...then down the sea wall.
We reached Carmarthen and I'd had enough of my teeth chattering, so alighted, leaving this shameless Pacer crank, seen getting a phot, to get his mileage in.
The railway here used to carry on up to Aberystwyth, the line shutting throughout in the 1960s, and the last remnants for Milk Traffic to Newcastle Emlyn, ending in the early 1980s.
I'd checked with the control, and the next Milford Haven service was a 175, So I had an hour to kill. I headed over the river and into town.
My first stop was this place.
Carmarthen Park was opened in 1900, which makes its main feature, the cycling track, the world's oldest outdoor concrete velodrome in continuous use. In its heyday, it was one of the UKs premier venues, and it was here that having motorised pace setters was first introduced. Nowadays the quality of the drugs means that superbikes use cyclists as pace setters.
There is this fantastic collection of stands, though the public nature of the park means they are a case study in roller shuttering.
These days, the ground is used by Carmarthen Harlequins in rugby, ra ra ra, union. I think they play in the Welsh league but I have zero interest in finding out any more.
Next it was through the town centre to Parc Myrddin, home of Carmarthen Stars, who are sort of Carmarthen Town's reserve team. The ground was a stop off on the xxx hop earlier this year. There was still a ball of flaking skin and dandruff buzzing around the ground, powered by the residual static from 70 pairs of nylon Farrahs.
Across the road is the Richmond Park home of Carmarthen Town of the Welsh Premier.
Unfortunately the ground was on lock down, so here is a camera over the fence shot. The main stand is out of view to the right.
It was now time to head back to the station. I was quite taken by the world's poshest Spar.
So much that I purchased some Cabrales. This is a Spanish cheese which is basically just a pure mix of salt and Penicillium, which creates a cheese bluer than the political views of Whetherspoons clientele. To say it stinks is an understatement, so I enjoyed round 1 with it on the station approach ramp.
A few minutes down, my more comfortable steed arrived.
After parting with the Pembroke Dock branch at Whitland, and branching off the main line to Fishguard Harbour at Clarbestone Road, we arrived into a still frosty Haverfordwest. It developed in Norman times as it was the first crossing point of the Cleddau river. The adjacent hill tops also gave it prime locations to build fortresses. This then attracted the royal households to set up enclaves, which gave the area its 'little England' tag, though more strangely, wiz, the Flemish Lord who sounds more like a variety club magician, also had a castle here. Since then, the town's prominence has largely been self perpetuating as the county town of Pembrokeshire. It does have an impressive list of notable offspring, including Christian Bale, Terrence Higgins, Rhys Ifans, Elis James, Chelsea Manning, Gruff Rhys and Suggs.
A ten minute walk took me to a sign that proclaimed it to be the entrance to the ground.
However, a further five minutes round the outskirts of a Halfords, didn't look promising. However, from behind an abandoned abattoir, the floodlights could be spotted.
Sure enough, this took me to the entrance to the ground.
Five pound entrance and I was in.
Haverfordwest County 2 v Goytre 2, Welsh Football League - Division 1.
Haverfordwest FC were formed in 1899. After various changes of name to Town, Atchletic and finally County, they also progressed from the Pembrokeshire league to the Welsh League (which is really just a South Wales league) in the 1950s. They stayed in it, mostly in the top division, until the formation of the League of Wales, to which they were founder members. Since then, they have had hopped between the Welsh league and the Welsh Premier, currently in the former having come last in the latter last season.
Goytre are from Penperlleni, just north of Pontypool, which makes this the longest trip in the entire league. They were formed in 1902, and since then have spent most of their time being confused with the higher profile Goytre United, from Port Talbot. After many years in local leagues, they joined the Gwent County at the turn of the century, which they waltzed through, before moving up to the Welsh League, where steady progress has seen three promotions up to the top division.
As far as I can work out, the club have always played at the New Bridge Meadow Stadium. The only thing I was trying to work out was if the ground has shifted backwards, with the Tesco’s being on the original site.
On one touchline is this main stand.
However, down the other were the stereotypical Welsh Premier ground grading white elephants. A string of hastily constructed Atcost pre-fabs to get to the required seating capacity.
And a huge TV gantry. If all the TV gantrys that the league enforced, were built of Welsh steel, Port Talbot would have an order book to keep its workforce employed for the next four millennium.
There were some very small terraces either side of the main stand.
As well as an intriguing doorway into an enchanted world of groundsman’s clutter.
Pleasingly, a @keepers_towels double. The home keeper with his roughly dumped in the goal...
...the away keeper with his hung up.
@nonleaguedogs
The ground was a mix of ecclesiastical horizons. A spire and a tower behind the clubhouse end...
...and St Davids on the touchline, though you had to view from the right end...
...or else you just get a view of the top of a Sports Direct.
As well as the exceptionally low dugouts, was this strange contraption with a couple of seats, facing away from the pitch.
There were also a couple of luxury hospitality suites.
Havefordwest took the lead after a couple of minutes
However, Goytre soon equalised and then took the lead just before half time.
However, the home side equalised in the second half and the game finished 2-2.
I headed back into the town centre, this time for a bus move.
On the train in, I'd noticed a couple of gents who looked dead certs for groundhoppers. One of them turned up at the game ten minutes after I'd got there. The other was on the bus when I got on it. The shoulders were a giveaway that my initial assessment was right.
We headed over the hills through Johnston. This gave a great view of oil refineries in every direction.
I departed the bus on the outskirts of Milford Haven.
This led me to my final game. I was only going to get the last 15 minutes of it, but Milford United had a couple of great looking stands.
Entering the ground, it was obvious that some work was going on, but I didn't really take that much notice of the huge pile of concrete and rusting steel.
Milford United 1 v Angle 2, Pembrokeshire League.
Milford United were formed in 1895. By the 1940s, they were playing in the Welsh Football league, on a par with local rivals Haverfordwest. They had some success, with a few division 2 titles and a runners up position in the top division. However, this century has not been kind on the club, with them dropping down to the Pembrokeshire league, and struggling in that, including a season with 26 straight defeats.
Angle is a small village, right on the tip of the peninsula opposite Milford Haven. The village is most well known for its lifeboat station, who came to prominence in the late 19th century for a daring rescue of a Glasgow steamer (that sounds like a profanosaurus entry) where in treacherous seas, the lifeboat saved the lives of the 30 occupants, but somehow couldn't save the 7000 crates of whiskey that were on board, so the locals had to go down the next day and take them all home for safe keeping. Their isn't too much written about their football team, other than they joined the Pembrokeshire league in the 1960s, playing in the lower divisions, before reaching the top division a couple of seasons ago.
With the light fading, my first duty was to go and get some pictures of these historic stands.
Just one problem. They weren't there.
Sure enough, the perimeter walls revealed large patches of disturbed grounds.
Speaking to a photographer, he said that after being in situ for 40 odd years, the stands had been knocked down in the last few weeks. Buigger. So here is a final view of them.
All that remained was the changing room block.
Behind the main pitch, was another pitch, which was hosting a third team, with some proper Sunday league looking players.
The standard looked to be on a par with the Scottish Championship.
Back to the main action. One remnant of the stands was the club sign, which was now on the changing rooms roof.
The home side seemed to then put most of their effort into complaining about the ref, which suprisingly, didn't lead to equaliser, so the game finished 1-2.
With the game over, I headed into town. Milford Haven is a fairly recent populous, being developed in 1790 as a whaling port. It was soon taken over by the admiralty as the bay gives excellent deep water shelter. This also attracted the oil companies, and the town is now at the centre of uk oil importation, the port being the fourth biggest in the UK in terms of tonnage. No one of any importance is from the town, other than a 1980s serial killer and the winner of the 2005 Welsh Darts Open.
Down to the sea front, with its promenade and band stand.
This gives a lovely view over to the oil refinery and power station at Pembroke. The Billingham of the south.
Also on the promenade was this Stone Age crazy golf course...
...carved out of stone in Neolithic times.
I headed to had down to the quayside.
This is where the railway station is located. From here it was the 1708 Cardiff service, thankfully formed of a 175 'hungry hippo'.
This took me to Swansea.
Where it was on to a London bound HST.
The convenience store next to Swansea station seems to stock strange varieties of main stream products, on this occasion pickled onion Walkers and cherry Coke Zero.
Onwards around Swansea bay, lit up in the darkness. At Cardiff, we picked all the rugby supporters coming back from the international versus South Africa. Being sober on a train full of rugby union supporters is akin to waking up mid-way through an operation. You have no option but to have to sit there for an hour, as these tiresome wankers, who think they are the greatest set of supporters on earth, smoke, swear and shout utter pompous shite, on their way back to London, all because of some tenuous Gaelic ancestry. Nevertheless, it is a good opportunities to reaffirm that not only is League by far the better version of the game, as its supporters are also immeasurably more tolerable.
Anyway, back into Swindon and apart from the last hour, a very enjoyable day out in the principality.
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