Rhino Time

Eastern Rhinos 22 - Wests Warriors 8, London Men’s Premier Rugby League

Most of the south rugby league competition are drawing to a close and for once, the South Premier (or London Premier as it is renamed this season) looks to be a close call. Colchester’s (nee Ipswich) Eastern Rhinos top the league by a point from South West London Chargers, who have a game in hand. In effect, it is exiled northern squadies versus exiled Aussie bar workers. This game saw the Rhinos take on Wests Warriors, who as the name suggest, are actually Kiwi bar workers from Acton.

Anyway, prelude to the game was a day/night in Norwich, in a heroic attempt to clear all 20 of the Guide pubs the city is blessed with.  

A trip to Norwich is like the West Coast Main Line in the 1990s, class 90s and un-refurbished Mk3s. The locos have at least had local names bestowed on them, Skoda 7 took me on the down leg and is now named “Sir John Betjemen”, on the right is perhaps the biggest transformation, 90012, which was once “The 'D' Oyly Carte Opera Company” is now “Royal Anglian Tank Regiment”.

However, some locos aren’t as lucky. Chuntering away infront of the football ground was what used to be Duff 47 607 Royal Worcester and is now 47786 Roy Castle.

Anyway, a valiant attempt was made at all 20, with 18 seemingly the end total, confirmed with vague memories and almost complete beer notes. Good mixture of Woodforde’s, Lacons, Fat Cat and Humpty Dumpty.  Most notable find was Golden Best on this far from Ingrow.

Next morning was the second reason for visiting Norwich. The Saturday Yarmouth’s have reverted to loco hauled and now use DRS (the rail division of BnF) class 37s, so a quick spin was had to the coast and back. Atomic Tractors 419 and 059 bask in the East Anglian sunshine.

Next was the pleasant hop down to Colchester (90003 - Raedwald of East Anglia). Rhinos play at the Colchester RUFC which is a huge complex on the east of town, which is fortuitously on a company run bus route so could use passes.

Centrepiece is a fairly brutal bar/changing room/amenities block.

And so to the game. Advertised as a 1430 kick off. Got there at 1420 to find only one side present and no referee. Was this to be the third week in a row with a no-show?

Ground backs on to the Colchester Community Stadium or whatever name it goes by, so time was wasted having a look at that, watching cricket on the adjacent field, and having my genitals continuously sniffed by a boxer dog called Chav.

But low and behold, the away side did arrive. And then we waited some more and a ref arrived. And then we started. Rhinos were well organised as ever by ex Bronco Peter Le Marquand, who has been with them since their Ipswich days. Soon went 12-0 up. Rhinos got another couple before Wests pulled one back to make the final score 22-8.

Back to Liverpool Street where the big news is that the International Cheese Centre has re-opened just round the corner from its previous location, which has become the worlds biggest Boots (fucking Tory loving Swiss tax dodgers). A Shropshire blue roll, 6 for the price of 5 pick and mix, and a sheath of saucisson sticks were purchased for the journey home.